


Stupid Winchester

by SeeEmRunning



Series: Run-ins [5]
Category: Criminal Minds, Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, Gen, The BAU likes to joke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-17
Updated: 2014-03-17
Packaged: 2018-01-16 02:51:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1329115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeeEmRunning/pseuds/SeeEmRunning
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When they run into someone more than once, they remember them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stupid Winchester

**Author's Note:**

  * For [trueunbeliever](https://archiveofourown.org/users/trueunbeliever/gifts).



> This was originally just a silly little headcanon I have for this series, and then I was asked to write and share. So have some fun BAU jokes about our favorite monster hunter.

It started sometime after Morgan helped Sam Winchester limp out of the abandoned warehouse with a bullet in his foot.

In April, Garcia flicked up a crime scene photo and said, "So we have three sixteen-year-old boys here, all decapitated."

"Winchester in the area?" Morgan muttered to Reid, who bit back a laugh.

In May, there was a different photo on the screen. Kidnapped sixteen-year-old boys, dating back thirteen years. "Bet Winchester was a target," Reid whispered to Morgan.

Two weeks later, they got back from a rash of drownings and JJ said, "Well, at least Winchester wasn't there."

Shallow graves in Oklahoma led them to a woman with shelves full of herb-stuffed leather bags. Rossi thought he caught sight of Sam in the area, but when he tried to get a closer look, he was gone. He shook his head and chalked it up to exhaustion; they'd run into the kid twice, what were the odds they'd find him again?

August came, with ex-Marines tortured, killed, and dumped in Dumpsters. "Winchester's father was a Marine, right?" JJ asked rhetorically.

"If he's there, I'll make you dinner," Rossi promised her.

"And if he's not?"

 _"I'll_ make you dinner," Morgan said.

JJ shuddered. "I've had your cooking. Winchester being there might save my life."

Even Hotch smiled at that.

Jack went to school in September; Hotch came in late from dropping him off and said, "What do you think, can we make it through the school year without running into Winchester again?"

They couldn't, and Winchester looked like hell when they found him at the school where teenagers were asphyxiating themselves, and then they found out he was epileptic. For a few weeks, the jokes died down.

Then they caught a case involving a reunion for a school that had suffered a bombing, and on the plane, Prentiss said softly, "Wonder if Winchester goes there now."

They all groaned. "If he does, I'm gonna whup his ass for making himself look like a good suspect," Morgan said.

"If you _can_ whup his ass," Rossi said mildly. "Have you forgotten that brawl?"

"That wasn't a brawl, that was a pile-on," JJ said. "Still don't know how he got out of that one unhurt."

"He was hurt," Hotch said. "He was stitching up a cut on his arm when we gave him our cards."

"And he didn't go to the hospital?" JJ demanded.

"He couldn't even afford a decent motel, how would he have managed hospital bills?" Rossi asked rhetorically.

There was silence for a few moments before Prentiss said, "If he's there, twenty bucks says he knows exactly who it is."

Morgan threw a crumpled piece of paper at her in response.

Once they called Garcia to look something up, and she saw Sam Winchester on a security camera the night before they got there. She also caught them leaving town the same day. "Stupid Winchester," she grumbled.

Morgan chuckled. "That's what he does, baby girl, he shows up and disappears."

It went on like that for a few years, and then they got called out to Stanford University for an LDSK. "Bet Winchester's an undergrad," Reid said.

"I'll take that bet," Morgan answered. "Loser buys dinner?" 

"Deal."

"I'm in," JJ said. "He's not there."

"Same," Rossi said.

So when Reid and Morgan found him working in a bookstore to pay his way through Stanford, Reid hid a smile. When they left, he said innocently, "I think you lost."

Morgan rolled his eyes. "Yeah, you won. Let's go figure out where he's gonna strike next."


End file.
